Why Living In
Rage Is For You:
Imagine the
merciless jerk you've always fantasized about becoming. You are
pushed aside and ignored, given bad directions,
locked out in the rain, saddened by your own organs, unable to find the brand you prefer, deceived while
growing up, and tortured by your
boss/parents/partner/society/football team/customer service
representative. You've resisted giving yourself over to the ferocious
power bitterly rising within by weathering the tortures of this cruel
reality like a modern-day saint, and without the appreciation you deserve. It's time you truly understand how right it is to be
mad. Go ahead. Be mad. I'm mad. Anyone who is paying attention
should be mad. Welcome to the beginning of Living in Rage.
Reader, perhaps you
have picked up this instructional course as a passing curiosity, or
seen it briefly mentioned in our media hellscape and wished to
investigate. Maybe you accidentally stumbled upon this instructional
course in your quest to read A Rage to Live or Living With Rage. Could be you have opened this book because a swelling,
lavish anger has made itself known in your life, and certain people
around you have encouraged you to remove this part of your character
like an unfortunate vestigial organ. Possibly some court system or
coercive force from friends or family have pushed you into seeking
“solutions” to the virulent force that boils in your throat even
now. Perhaps you already feel the heady truth in a swell of
passionate bile thrumming up through your body like an infusion of
animal power from another dimension. However you have arrived here, I urge you to stay and explore this wild and determined
spirit that inhabits you, and seek a higher self that can be accessed
with my system of self-improvement. If this is not your intention, or
you don't feel up to embracing your inner strength, you are free to
fuck off, weakling.
About Me:
I would never have
imagined, years ago, just one of a few angry men violently taking
control of our Rageoholics Anonymous group, that I was building a
philosophy that could help others, and I never could have dreamed,
when I was just another anger coach roaring and smashing things in
the dark of my ex-wife's garden shed, that I would be part of a
world-wide movement. I guess it's all just a testament to the power
of rage, which has brought us so much.
I was encouraged in
these early years to record my revelations, a suggestion by my then
friend and colleague, the pathetic rat fuck David Barbaro, who has
now shown his true colors and who can rot in Hell with the rest of
his minions in the Cult of Fury, which is a lifeless charade propagated by
phonies who deserve to be crushed like maggots. As the crowds at my
talks, demonstrations, rampages and arrests grew, I became more adept at
tapping deeply into the rage inside me, and I realized I had become part
of something greater than myself. One night, on hold with my cable
company while watching network news coverage and trying to open the
plastic packaging around a pair of headphones with my bare hands, I
had a transcendent experience. I was sobbing and hyperventilating,
smashing my most treasured possessions and breaking down some wall by
hand, when suddenly a new white-hot gateway of seething wrath opened
inside me and I found myself in a place of limitless rage, pure and
ever-flowing. No other emotion had ever filled me with such holy
purpose: rage gave me a sense of entitled righteousness, made surety
rise within me, and narrowed my path to one inevitable choice. I
believe this eternal furnace of avarice is inside all of us,
available to any who seek, and given generously to those with access
to motor traffic or a capitalist society.
So if you're
wondering about that new lump, looking at your savings, glaring at
the front of the line, missing interpersonal signals, making
beginner's mistakes (that any goddamn fucking idiot would avoid),
getting stupid mail, wasting your time with someone who doesn't care,
and a billion other unavoidable realities of life, it's time you
choose spite. Choose avarice. Choose rancor. I'm not asking you to
give up on the world, I'm saying put your money on a different horse.
Why You Should
Embrace Rage:
Rage is a
superpower. For one thing, it instantly makes you right about
everything. It throws your whole life into perspective and connects
you to the now. It casts aside the inhibiting power of others and
justifies all your needs. Rage can easily overcome fear, logic,
self-preservation, even love. It is is a power source that
perpetuates itself and is easily spread. Negative feedback from
aggressive anger only feeds that anger further. Rage builds on
itself; it self-replicates, multiplies. New sources of rage lay
around you, waiting to be tapped: keys fall through plumbing,
umbrellas are unfaithful, people blame you for your failures, bad
deals sit in their paperwork and plan your future, sex turns despotic
and unrevealing, motor traffic is arbitrary and cruel, food probes
our neuroses and television fills us with a passive exhaustion that
makes us better and better at giving up.
In the following
book, you'll find:
- The Living in Rage Activity Booklet: A series of written activities where readers can fill in instructive lists such as Things Everybody Gets to Have Except Me, Reasons I'm Not Rich, and People Who Are Fucking It Up For the Rest of Us. Embark on personal exploration with The Failures Reflected Back In the Eyes of Your Partner, and Past Opportunities That Could Have Made Everything Different worksheets.
- The Cultivation of Rage Zones: A guide to securing a hole for yelling into, a tree you can strike, a nearby animal you can threaten, or the art of spontaneously using a public space to talk to yourself out loud in that special tone you use when you become a conduit for greater forces.
- Tips For Maintaining Rage: Fatigue often slows down productive sessions, so this course provides simple tips like staying at a job or turning on a computer, to more developed practices like mantras of bitterness and regrets to feed and cling to.
Testimonials from
Readers:
“I used to try and
find common ground when I spoke to others about politics. Now I
devote twenty-five hours a week to lifting huge weights and combat
training while I listen to angry talk radio. You should see how
powerful I get when someone disagrees with me on the internet!”
-Ryan S.
“It's like there's
pieces of me licking other pieces of me across the
hot rim of all surfaces. I'm probably ruining the
neighbors' marriage through the wall with all the rotten thoughts and
bad movement I'm cultivating.”
-Matt Z.
“Thanks to Living
in Rage, I've stopped going to therapy, and now instead I
walk around on rainy days and stomp on my face's reflection in
puddles.”
-Brendan B.
So join the
seething ranks, and become a part of the problem. There is an
infinite, everlasting source of anger that calls to each person from
the beyond. Existence is unjust, and we can feel this basic truth
under the surface at all times, calling us to the true path. Reach
out and embrace this higher force; the energy behind all creation.
It's not important that you recognize this force as some established,
institutional god; I have many followers who do not wish to worship
any personified god of mainstream religion, but instead rely on a
more personal Higher Power, an eternal wellspring of madness to tap
into and maintain their connection to anger. In my book I'll show you
how to embrace and seek this limitless channel of holy rage and use
it in your day-to-day life. One thing I've always enjoyed about anger
is that it is a one-size-fits-all solution. From solving
problems at the airport and on the street to dealing with parents, or
getting what you think you want from your spouse (just ask my sixth
wife, Lana), anger instills you with a charisma and confidence you've
always wanted, and even works for a pathetic miscreant like yourself,
dummy.
